-other, -other, -other

I guess the Moon is dancing around in Capricorn or SOME kind of weird shit like that is going on cosmically cause weird shit happened yesterday.

First, the pocket of infection in my face finally exploded! TMI! Ah, but it was so satisfying. I'm surprised I didn't wake Brad up cause I yelled, "HOLY SHIT!" The explosion wasn't YouTube worthy or anything, but it was still something that just SHOULDN'T have to happen! Ugh! It is certainly going to leave a nasty scar on my cheek, but I just HAD to find out if it was indeed some kind of cyst or like a nest of spider eggs or maybe the answer to world peace or the cure for cancer. It had to be done. Brad wants me to man up and finally go to a dermatologist. I just hate going! All I have are memories of going and being berated for picking at my skin, or worse, a reaction from the doctor along the lines of, "Oh wow, this is really bad, never seen anything like this." Cause that totally happened to me last time I went. Amatuers.

And in other weird news, and this is really weird... well, some back information may be helpful. I'm a bastard. That's the short version. I'm pretty proud of it, it's kind of my own personal N word. I own that word, dammit. I've got my siblings, ie: brother and sisters from another father, type deal. And I have an older brother from another mother and we've stayed in contact over the years after the discovery. And I've known about the presence of another brother from another mother (other other other), but never made any contact with him. Cause you never know if the realization of such relationships is gonna ruin a family dynamic or something. Like I didn't confront my first brother until I knew for a certainty that he was aware that his step dad wasn't his biological dad. I'm not in the business of ruining happy family facades.

And reaching out to this other brother (who is younger than me), has a huge caveat, it brings me dangerously close to the father I have never met, as he was claimed by said father in ways me and the older brother weren't. And I don't know if I want that yet. The whole thing is a mystery to me, and that is frustrating, because I know there are people in this town who know more about events surrounding my existence than I do. And I'm pretty sure my family has no desire for me to be curious about this, particularly my grandparents. But I'm an adult now, I call the shots. And it's perfectly natural for me to be curious. It's weird not knowing half of where you came from. Even if the dude was essentially a sperm donor and nothing more. You just want to get a look at them. Search for the resemblance. Explain shit. Although I've always doubted there would be a huge resemblance, because I am practically a carbon copy of my mother. Seriously, it's creepy.

So I finally decided to just do it, and months ago I sent a little message to little brother, it was innocent enough, something along the lines of 'are you so and so's son?' Never heard back. Didn't know what that might mean, and I over anaylze everything, so all kinds of stories rolled around in my head. And yesterday, a day like any other, he writes back. One thing leads to another and now I know my brother. Life is crazy. And for the first time in my life, I get to see what my dad looks like. And my other grandma. It's like finding pieces to a puzzle that's been nagging at you for 28 years. I've never known much about the man, but now I know he's a ginger. LOL A damned freckled ginger. And he's Irish, so now I'm like SUPER IRISH! Which is awesome to know. And little brother didn't know he had blood siblings, it never occurred to me that he would be excited to hear it. Pretty cool. So that's my story for November 30th, 2011.